Old Quotes/UKC/Fourth Page

"Could you hand over your knife and sign for it, please." - Stuart.
"Ok. Hand it over, sign for it, then take it back." - Adam.

 "There's a receptionist standing inside." - Stuart.

"They couldn't afford a desk, then?" - Anthony.
"She's standing behind a desk." - Stuart.
"So they couldn't afford a chair, then?" - Adam.

 "If you'd just like to take seats..." - Stuart.

"Ok, let's go." - Mark, miming picking up a chair.

 "As my father used to say, 'use a thief to catch a thief', no offence." - Stuart.

"Did he always add the 'no offence'?" - Anthony.

 "It looks like it was in some sort of explosion." - Stuart.

"That's because it was in some sort of explosion." - Anthony.
"Explosion?" - Stuart.
"Yes; it was in some sort of explosion." - Adam.

 "I wouldn't call it an oil rig in front of the architects, if you value your lives." - Stuart.

"So these architects can take out a party of armed shadowrunners?" - Anthony.
"Why don't you hire the architects to guard the conference?" - Adam.

 "It says under scout you need a mail shirt...." - Mark.

"Can you have a female shirt instead?" - Stuart.

 "Can we lock them from the inside?" - Stuart, talking about the doors to a stable the party wished to leave the horses in.

"From the inside?" - Mark.
"Yes. If we lock them from the inside, we can stop other people coming in." - Stuart.
"But then we can't get out." - Adam.
"We can always unlock them again and go out." - Stuart.

 "I'll flip open the sword with my door." - Stuart.

 "Shh! Be quiet, I can hear lots of people moving behind us. (Pause) It's the rest of the party." - Stuart, whilst scouting.

 "There's a door on the outside of the wall." - Mark.

"But only on the outside of the wall?" - Anthony.

 "Quails don't fly, they bounce." - Stuart.

 "The guard says to you, 'What's wrong?'" - Rob.

"There's a shuriken in my leg!" - Stuart.

 "Ninjas aren't killing machines." - Stuart.

 "I have my mother's eyes and my father's syphilis." - Stuart.

 "The stones are cunningly disguised as small roundish sheets of metal." - Stuart, as the party expressed interest at his pouch of "stones".

 "I have had several attempts on my lives." - Mark.

 "What is this 'Tie up your affairs'? He expects us to tie up members of the populace?" - Stuart.

"Only if you've been having affairs with them." - Anthony.

 "Polar bears are good at climbing trees." - Stuart.

 "I suggest I go ahead and check for traps." - Paul.

"That's all very well and good, but we've got a boat." - Mark.

 "You can't pass a heavy lance off as a ring!" - Anthony.

 "What were you doing on a fishing boat?" - Anthony.

"Fishing?" - Mark.

 "Can everyone check their backpacks to make sure we haven't got any more dark, evil liches with us?" - Stuart.

 "Can you wear them unobtrusively?" - Richard, talking about knuckle dusters.

 "Tie yourself to the rigging!" - Mark.

"I didn't think this boat had any rigging?" - Richard.
"Fuck! What have I tied myself to?!" - Anthony.

 "Surrender now or I will be forced to die horribly." - Anthony, when greatly outnumbered and outpowered.

 "Stuart, what's your current character? I've lost track." - Rose.

 "Did you hear what I said, Stuart?" - Anthony. 

"Yes. (Pause) Hang on, what did you say?" - Stuart.

 "We didn't notice the 40 storey building at all?" - Adam.

 "Sorry, I mistook myself for a god." - Stuart (sincerely).

 "All of these snotlings charge out of the wall at you." - Rob.

"This is the beginning of a an encounter, isn't it?" - Richard.

 "They were carrying lots of pack horses." - Mark.

 "It's your bet." - Stuart, playing poker whilst on watch.

"There's a 10 foot high monster coming." - Adam (nonchalantly).

 "I'm waiting for someone to repair the field rations." - Stuart.

 "We spent some time with the wild krim. They're quite hospital." - Stuart.

 "They're all human, except for the troll." - Stuart.

 "Is the nuclear missile armed?" - Richard 2.

"Yes, it's got an uzi." - Adam.

 "I look confused." - Dave 1.

"I'll look confused as well then. It might be some form of custom." - Anthony, as a character who was alien to the culture.

 "They all died." - Robert, talking about his fellow soldiers.

"Where?" - Adam.
"Oh, here, there, and everywhere...." - Robert.

 "Do you want to tell him your name?" - Dave 1 to Stuart, who just looked at him blankly.

 "You wish to hire yourself out?" - Mark, in an annoyed voice.

"Did I mention hiring out? (Pause) We charge reasonable rates." - Stuart.

 "Can you get more?" - Adam, talking to a horse dealer who didn't like him very much, when he wants to buy a dozen horses (the seller only had 10).

"No." - Mark.
"So what happens when you run out? Do you close?" - Adam.

 "I'm keeping a bow nocked to my arrow." - Stuart.

 "I'm looking them over and checking them out using my general knowledge of carts, which I don't have." - Stuart.

 "Anybody want to help me paint this cart?" - Stuart.

"Got any paint?" - Dave 1.
"No." - Stuart.

 "I'll take a torch and go looking for this gunpowder." - Robert.

 "There are lots of posters applying for caravan guards." - Stuart.

 "I drew my sword and missed quite well." - Rob.

 "I'm going to to go and try and find a chest big enough to hold several double-handed weapons." - Richard.

 "Would it be better if I took my armour off, though?" - Richard 1, talking about going out to eat dinner.

 "Kien's just sitting in the campfire." - Mark.

 "He's dead." - Richard.

"Can I get my third attack in, then?" - Mark.

 "Is anyone going to give me any money to get all this stuff?" - Adam.

"I'll give you one gold crown." - Dave 1.
"Thanks; but are you going to give me any money to get all this stuff?" - Adam.

 "Does he notice I look like a corpse?" - Richard.

 "Eat? Drink? Food?" - Richard, whilst simultaneously miming appropriate actions, to someone who couldn't speak the same language.

"Conga?" - Stuart.

 "We need to hire a competent mage from the Mages' Guild." - Stuart.

"No we don't; we have Kiliandren." - Richard.
"We need to hire a competent mage from the Mages' Guild." - Stuart.

 "I don't know why you want sleep gas, but...." - Rob.

"In case we come across any sleeping guards." - Richard.

 "She drowned bravely." - Mark.

 "How much do you charge for a gold coin?" - Richard.

 "I don't have a dwarf stronghold on the back of my sheet." - Rose.

 "You are not an empire of the citizens...." - Stuart, to a party member.

 "Why have I got big reductions on all my stats?" - Mark.

"You're dead!" - Stuart.

 "I draw my throat." - Dave 1.

 "I follow etiquette," - Stuart, whose repeated examples of not doing so appear throughout this document.

 "I don't like members of the party going around insulting krim nobles." - Stuart.

"That's his job." - Anthony.

 "I don't like insinuations against members of the party, so could you show us the contents of your backpack." - Stuart, to a member of the party.

 "A fish doesn't look like a floating skull, it's unnatural and unholy!" - Stuart.

 "He will laminate lots of undead." - Jan.

 "I hate Kellarn!" - Rob.

"So do I, but he's fun at parties!" - Stuart.

 "Evening, Captain? Would you like to take a seat? Pull up a drink." - Stuart.

 "When you get home... the door's still there!" - Stuart.

 "A lot of the clothing looks empty." - Stuart.

 "There are some strange things floating in the ice." - Stuart.

 "Have you got any contacts in the morgue?" - Stephen.

"Yeah, my uncle died yesterday." - Stuart.

 "Nothing unnerves me. (Pause) Can we go now?" - Stuart 2, in a disturbing room.

 "What's the ground like?" - Anthony.

"I don't know... earthy?" - Mark.

 "I've got this nagging sense of something at the back of my head." - Stuart.

"That's hair." - Anthony.

 "You can hear smells going throughout the kitchen." - Stuart.

 "They didn't take my clothes off just because I was unconscious." - Richard 2.

 "I've got unarmed combat at 8... but I don't think I've got anything to do unarmed combat with." - Al.

 "Oh what? She's dead?" - Paul, about somebody whose head came off.

 "If the plane is unrecoverable, retrieve the fight recorder." -  Stuart, in a handout.

 "We're lost." - Dave 1, when it was pointed out that the party's ship should be in the sea.

 "That arrow was in your shoulder. The next will track left and slightly down." - Stuart.

"You actually hit him in the leg." - Mark.

 "I put the sword on the table in it's scarab." - Stuart.

 "He's a woman." - Sarmad.

 "I'm just a stranger from these parts." - Sarmad.

 "We fight amongst his banner." - Mark.

 "He carefully jacks into the explosives." - Stuart.

 "[The chip] is in the safety deposit box." - Richard 2.

"What did you do with the key?" - Stuart.
"That's also in the... oh, no." - Richard 2.

 "Why do we have to save the world, at all?" - Mark.

 "Something seems to be bothering you." - Rob.

"Yes, my neck is vibrating." - Snowy.

 "Can you have it ready for exactly about one o'clock today?" - Stuart.

 "You're driving along the train tracks...." - Stuart, to a player driving a van.

 "The night goes on into the wee hours of the morning..." - Stuart.

 "There's a lot of useless stuff around." - Stuart."Like party members?" - Anthony.

 "Did she catch that from you?" - Corin, whilst studying a list of the medical complaints of the dead lover of a PC.

"What, death?" - Paul.

 "Weren't you supposed to be dead at some point?" - Paul.

 "Oh shit, I've got a leather jerkin...." - Sarmad, after spending 10 minutes arguing with the ship's quartermaster about borrowing a leather jerkin.

 "First, an apology on behalf of my dearest friend... what was your name again?" - Sarmad.

 "Casually undress the sword." - Dave 3.

 "I'm running in twelve different directions." - Stuart.

 "These are archers after my own heart. (Pause) I think that's a bad word to use, actually." - Stuart.

 "I'm running over to these people, check whether they're alive and give them a bit of healing potion if they're not." - Stuart, talking about wounded NP Cs.

 "I wouldn't go home if I were you." - Paul.

"Er, I'm home at the moment." - Richard 2.

 "It's the middle of the night, but you don't know it because you're asleep." - Anthony.

 "There's a storm brewing." - Mark.

"I thought it was tea." - Stuart.

 "I reckon we need more than two people if we're going to kill her." - Dave 3, right in front of the previously unsuspecting person he's talking about.

 "... A battle about which you can tell your children, and your grandchildren after that." - Stuart.

"About how we caught an old woman in a cave, and beat her to death." - Dave 3.

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• Old Quotes/UKC/Fifth Page